The adventurous Zoo.

WALT check that we have used complex punctuation correctly.

To be successful we will:

Have the basics - all sentences begin with capital letter, end with full stop

Use commas for phrases and lists

Use apostrophes for ownership and contractions

Dialogue is correctly punctuated (guided writing lesson link here)

I think I was successful because I was able to add talking in my story.

Next time I will try to add similes and use structure correctly.

 

The Adventurous Zoo.

“Lazahris guess where we are?” said Delynah. Lazahris replied with excitement, “The zoo,the zoo!”First of all we strolled down to visit the monkeys. They were staring at me like they were going to attack me because Lazahris and I were eating bananas,so we went and had a look at the elephants. One of the elephants were having a bath in a big rock pool then it came out and put some sand on its back for sunscreen. As cool as the animals were the sun was not because it was beaming down on us like there was a sun reflector reflecting off the sun. Thats when Delynah was over just walking in the hot hot sun. It was boiling hot.

After walking like miles we finally visited the tigers. A baby was asleep next to it's mother. It was so adorable but sadly we woke it up from the flash of the camera.

We watched as the tiger growled at us through the glass.

The giraffes were fantastic, they didn't do anything but eat leaves off the trees. It was magnificent. Delynah was getting annoyed because the sun was too hot and she just wanted the day to end. But sadly it didn’t. Her shoulders dropped and she let out a big sigh. “Can we go already?” She moaned with exhaustment.

At the end of the day my favorite was the giraffes and the spider monkeys. I had a great time at the zoo.  

At the end of the day my favorite was the giraffes and the spider monkeys. I had a great time at the zoo.